One of the biggest invisible costs of our current system is paid by mothers.
The village is broken and we are now tiny units that we call families. And inspite of all the empowerment in the world, the culture is so strong that it is the mother that becomes the primary care giver of the child.
Bringing up the child needs the village — diverse people and energies, and most of this work is left now with mothers alone.
On the other hand, there is an economic and productivity calling that mothers experience — the longing to earn, to make a difference (beyond bringing up the child) and to have a career.
Juggling the two is a serious stretch — while I am in deep admiration of mother-kind that they have the energy to do this, I find it unfair.
There is enough touchiness around motherhood to not pay for it — and perhaps that really isn’t the way anyways. We are only playing more into the values and rules of the system if we start looking at parenting as an economic activity.
But I wonder if the task of bringing up a child is sufficiently valued (by everyone including the parents themselves?) Do we celebrate and recognise it enough?
And if men are busy taking the economic burden, aren’t they also losing the opportunity to be equal parents?
In our current system, economic productivity and money trump all other forms of capital and ways of being. And we’ve pretty much bought into it.
For a few people this seems to be working but most of us are on the losing side, in so many different ways. Farmers, adivasis, mentally ill…..the list goes on….and yes…mothers…
P.S : I propose a product called “Mom Pass” given to mothers especially in early years of parenting that gives them license to rightfully involve others in parenting, freedom to move around (without guilt about their child) and participate in the rest of life as freely….